I'm possibly the worst blogger in the history of blogging, I just can't seem to stick to a bloody schedule or I simply just let 'life' get in the way. I don't know what it is with me lately to be honest with you, I'm just not feeling being around on social media at the moment and I guess you could say I've had a lot going on in my personal life. This post can be just a little catch up session maybe? You might actually get to know me a bit better which is something I care about a lot as I feel I come across a bit weird on social media. Normal posts should hopefully be on their way pretty soon as I've finally found the time to sit down and actually plan them out.
Anxiety
If you're an avid reader of my little blog or a follower of mine on twitter then you will know that a couple of months back my mum was admitted into hospital with kidney failure and since she was discharged my anxiety is through the roof. I don't want her to go through all of that again or for the medication to randomly stop working or to have a fall or fall ill when I'm not there, I'm beginning to realise how much my family members mean to me and It's worrying me that they're going to disappear out of my life. This is obviously the silliest thing to worry about because it's inevitable that they're not going to be around for my entire life but I the fear or losing someone is terrifying, especially when myself and my family were so close to losing my mum this year.
My anxiety can pop up at any time throughout the day which is incredibly annoying but since I've downloaded the Mindfullness app on my phone I've been able to control it more than I've ever been able to. I also believe that with my anxiety I'm constantly wanting to throw my phone away or shut down my laptop and just curl up in a ball, this is probably why I've not been on social media much. Hopefully my anxiety will calm down now that I'm back at uni so I'll be able to spend more time focusing on myself and my blog.
My anxiety can pop up at any time throughout the day which is incredibly annoying but since I've downloaded the Mindfullness app on my phone I've been able to control it more than I've ever been able to. I also believe that with my anxiety I'm constantly wanting to throw my phone away or shut down my laptop and just curl up in a ball, this is probably why I've not been on social media much. Hopefully my anxiety will calm down now that I'm back at uni so I'll be able to spend more time focusing on myself and my blog.
University
I am officially in my final year of uni and it's finally settling in that after this year I will never ever have to go through the horror that is education ever again. I had a couple of weeks off at the end of term last year as my mum wasn't well so I haven't been in that educational environment for 4 months so it's a pretty big shock to the system that I actually have to start doing all that work I have to catch up on and try my hardest this year. I'm going to seriously try and get organised this year so if you're a fellow blogger and have or know of a post all about how to stay motivated and organised then link me up guys! I am also looking for models or photographers so leave your info in the comments if you would like to get involved.
And The Lack of Motivation
With a mixture of all the things above I've taken myself away from blogging and social media. I'm starting to feel that my views and opinions are becoming generic and unwanted, this upsets me a little because I love blogging and the community are so amazing but part of me feels as if I've lost my mojo. I have so many posts planned but I think I may just be overthinking about what I'm actually going to write, I don't want to be boring or cliche and I don't want to produce something that I'm not 100% happy with. I'm actually getting close to reaching my 1st blogging anniversary which is mad but also amazing at the same time, I hope that this will give me the motivation that I've been looking for.
This has completely come at the wrong time as well because Halloween is literally my favourite time of year and I really wanted to put out some halloween looks for you guys. I've started out planning a few posts which is helping me tremendously with getting my motivation back up to where it should be and I should be back properly very soon!
This has completely come at the wrong time as well because Halloween is literally my favourite time of year and I really wanted to put out some halloween looks for you guys. I've started out planning a few posts which is helping me tremendously with getting my motivation back up to where it should be and I should be back properly very soon!
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If you're reading this and know of any good posts on how to get organised or to calm down anxiety then I would highly appreciate it if you could leave them down in the comments below. I've missed blogging so so much and I've forgotten how relaxing it actually is to just sit down and actually write a post! I've got so many posts planned already but if you have any suggestions for anything you would like to see or any products you want testing out then I'm all ears!
Thank you so much for reading lovelies
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